Silly Professor

I was listening to a lecture last night. The guy was talking about Phoenician and Hebrew history. For the Hebrew part of the lecture, he referenced the Bible. He spent a good two minutes talking about how this is the -only- source for these stories. How basically, your meant to take the Bible with a grain of salt. (Gordon Goodfellow HST: The West and the World; EP 10. Phoenicians and Hebrews.) He the proceeded to tell stories out the the Bible.

His tone was sarcastic, condescending- which is fine. But what really upset me was how inaccurate some of his... story was. For instance, Abraham took Isaac out to the desert to sacrifice him? Or did Joseph go straight to the Pharaoh's dungeon?

You know, I was very upset. For a few reason. First, if you were in the class... Wouldn't you correct him? The statistic is that 1 in 5 Americans are Christians. Where were they? The guy is a teacher, how hard and long does it take to look up the chapters?

How long does it take to read 4 chapters in the Bible! 15 minutes? 30 if your slow.

Then I had another verse come to mind. "You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things." Romans 2:1 NIV I just read this, 4 days ago. So... Let's pretend we're all in it together. What are the things that we are condemning him for that we are often doing ourselves.

What was his problem? He 'knew' the scriptures, without actually knowing them. He made references to stories without actually going back to check. God tells us of redemption through out his scriptures. Those two stories the professor told were VERY significant to that story.

Abraham was to sacrifice Isaac, but God provided him a ram the briars. Later, it is said, Jesus was provided what God provided for us and our sins. The story of Joseph was an example for us to learn Trust in the story of redemption in our lives. Like Joseph we are given promises, and despite the suffering and hardships we may experience, God is faithful.

We all know that God, through the blood of Jesus has forgiven our sins. Yet we live in lives of fear, of judgment, of basic stress. We are blind to the words in the scriptures. "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set yout free from the law of sin and death."
Romans 8:1, 2 NIV

God will stop at NOTHING to save us. By save, I mean all of those promises we are given. Look at the next scripture: "What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."t No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,t neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Romans 8:31-39 NIV

Silly professor. Silly me. God... Tells us all we need to know- if we only take the time to listen, and use our eyes to see.

We all want to be Loved

So I'm totally addicted to this whole blogging thing. Blogging is a blast! If you haven't gotten one, try it. I started my first blog years ago, on xanga. As my social network shifted to myspace, I moved most of my writing there. Then I moved to facebook with rest of the world.

So why a stand alone blog, like blogger?

There's a few reasons. A real blog allows me to keep my on to my stuff. I can shift my providers, upload from others. It let's me take my readers with me from media site to media site.

Like for instance, right now I have a bunch of friends experimenting with google+. Yet half of my friends haven't even heard of it. You have to get an invite to get on, so it will be a while before everyone gets a chance to look. All of my friends used to be on myspace... But no one ever looks there anymore. I remember when facebook was the new thing... Remember how at first no one cared?

Twitter? I'm on there... But... -shrug- (mDimitry)

As things shift and change, I can keep things... Together. I've pulled some of my favorite posts from the old blogs for continuity. I've purchased my own web address. It's all good. :-)

You see, I like to write. I like to write for the release it gives. I like to write for the record it lives. If you were to ask me what are the talents I have, I think writing would actually be listed there. Over the years I've had great teachers, great inspiration, phenomenal encouragement and feed back.

Fun Fact: Did you know that Social Networking creates similar reactions in the brain as say a hug? Check out this Dr. Love article in FastCompany.

I, really truly, feel we are all important. We are all somehow unique. I think that is why this whole social media thing took off like it did. It is not a fad- but rather something the whole message of Christianity has preached to us for millennia. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16).We are creative, loving, beings who make up what is important... We are worth the effort. We are worth the attention.

We all want love.

We all want to be loved.

Yeah?

-----------

A couple of things. Still looking for Your Blessings.

Also, I'm looking for Help with this blog. Want to Help Me?

Facing the Fall

As some of you might be aware, I love rock climbing.

It might come as a surprise to you, then, if I told you I am actually afraid of heights. Granted, over the years I have suppressed it to such an extent that it merely gives me an adrenaline high now.

Being a Russian, we're fatalists by nature, I have often thought about my own death. I am plagued with dreams of personal deaths. Drowning, car accidents, gunshots, and of course falling.

Especially, of course, since I've picked up rock climbing as a pretty constant hobby.

There is a rush, facing your fears. So much of our lives are lived in these pedantic, methodic, planned events, we miss what it is to be.... alive. We miss the fact that we are mere mortals. In my dreams, I die. Yet I also live. Have you ever wondered how... It would feel to die?

Imagine, high up, the tree line far below you. Your arms need rest, but your in a tough spot. No chance to stop, so you push forward. One hand, over the next, your feet always pushing. Your near the top of a over hang. Your hand reaches, you grasp, it all feels stable. You pull, shift your weight.

You begin to move, all your weight is now in that hand. Just as your release your other hand, you feel a slight.... lowering of the ledge your holding on.

There is a moment, a short pause, as your mind tries to understand what is happening. The rock moved. Your body tensed. It tensed too much, the rock never stopped moving, only your perspective on time.

You see... In dreams time is fluid. That pause... is yours to end. You know it can't go on forever. You know you will fall.

You have a moment to choose your death. Do you face the ground, or do you look up? I've had this dream before. I've tried both.

Three weeks ago, I was rock climbing. I was moving fast, faster than I should be. Near the top, I reach up for the last hold, and my fingers slipped. God, it is strange... as my fingers slipped past that last hold, time stopped.

You face your fears.

Somehow, I found my self facing another fear earlier this year. For what ever reason, I think my family is prone to... be emotional. We range, happy to sad. I'm sure all of us know what I'm talking about.

Sometimes life takes us a bit father than that range, and well, sadness becomes depression. So much of life, we struggle. We work hard, we push ourselves higher. We try to be better. We lift up, we grab onto something, and we pull. In one brief moment, we realize our dreams, our hopes, everything we counted on is like a bit of shoddy rock. It might have been there, exposed, open, inviting for hundreds of years- but too much weight... Or like at the gym, my fingers couldn't grasp it. Or you slip. But what ever the reason, you fall.

I recently fell at the gym, and even thought it was a long way down, my friend caught me. The rope that saved my body also burned me. Took three weeks to heal, and I'll have sweet scar for a looooong time.

"What is gained if I am silenced, if I go down to the pit? Will the dust praise you? Will it proclaim your faithfulness?" Psalm 30:9

In my life, God caught me. "You, lord, brought me up from the realm of the dead; you spared me from going down to the pit." Psalm 30:3 We will fall in life. There will be those moments where you think it's over.

I encourage you to look to something solid. "Lord my God, I called to you for help, and you healed me." Psalm 30:2 God, Jesus, is faithful. He may not answer your prayers exactly like you may want them to be answered. But He does. At least, He has for me.

------

Just a reminder- I am still collecting Submissions for my Your Blessings contest.

To find out how to win $50 bucks, check it out. :-)

Today's Debt Crisis

So looking out at the news today, you see a lot of articles about how our money in the States is about to crash. Our inability to pay our debts will lower our rating, making it more difficult to get more cash to continue the day to day operation of our government and society as a whole. Scary stuff.

Being a fan of history, I have seem this situation before. Other countries have struggled with debts in the face of suffering economies. Other Empires. Virtually all of them did, come of think of it. Some find ways to pull out, others shatter.

Fun fact: Part of what gave America a chance at freedom was King George's inability to finance his wartime efforts in Europe- "Taxation without Representation" anyone?

I've had a time in my life where I had debts I couldn't pay. I remember the feelings of... helplessness, desperation, in need of hope. I remember reading verses like Romans 13:8-9 "Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law. The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery,” “You shall not murder,” “You shall not steal,” “You shall not covet,”[a] and whatever other command there may be, are summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” and thinking to myself- how do I get past the first part!

It's funny how one can correlate our debts to sin. Our sins accumulate. They form a strange burden on us- and the bigger the burden, the more likely we are to fall.

So- I've been reading throughout the book of Romans. Do you ever read something and look at your life and say... Wow... I wish I had read this closely... 5 years ago! So much of what is there is relevant to our lives today. Rome was in a similar situation we are I now. The government was run by Nero- who was progressively more driven by a need for public approval. The government was experiencing budget deficits due to poor spending, recovery efforts from fires and disasters, and a war with Parthia. Nero was forced to debase his currency, and levy tribes from all over his empire.

It was this that caused the Roman-Jewish wars in the 66, which lasted till 70 and ended with the burning of the Temple. Though out this time, Christians- and Jews- were being blamed for more and more of the problems of the empire. Persecution during Nero was just the start. And yet in Romans 13:1-7 Paul wrote: 1 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. 3 For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. 4 For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. 5 Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience. 6 This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God’s servants, who give their full time to governing. 7 Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor.

Part of our responsibility as Christians is to... yes... be good little children and follow the laws and pay our taxes. Another is to 'understand the times. Romans 13:11-14 goes on to say: 11 And do this, understanding the present time: The hour has already come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. 12 The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. 13 Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. 14 Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh."

How much of our public debt related to our... Sin? I'm not advocating the government enforce spiritual laws as done by the Muslims; but rather we as Christians show an example of healthy living. I remember when I was a kid working for a 'wealthy' couple who owned a beautiful house on Lake Coeur d'Alene. I remember asking them how they became rich... and they looked at me. Then they laughed and said, "We're not rich." Yet I kept pressing. Eventually they told me, they merely saved. They invested. They didn't waste money. No gimmicks, not schemes, just lives well lived. They didn't drink heavy, they were frugal, non-consumeristic. They bought quality, only they needed it.

They didn't incur debt- rather they saved.

I think it will be a long time before we are out of this crisis in America. I'm curious to see if we will pull out of it. Somehow it doesn't matter to me. We have some very clear and easy things to do, as Christians. Be aware what is important, and learn to cut away all that isn't. Live a life of generosity towards others, and self control towards yourself. You are not your own, but bought by Jesus. Live that way.

I Have Lead a Blameless Life

The road we set out on is not always the one on which we find ourselves; nor are we entirely where we wanted to be by now. I've been reading through the Psalms lately, and one of the ones I find fascinating is Psalm 26. 'Vindicate me, Lord, for I have lead a blameless life. I have trusted in the Lord and have not faltered.'

Unfortunately I relate more to Psalm 25. 'Do not remember the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you, Lord, are good.' Sometimes the sins of our youth leave us ashamed. Sometimes we feel as... we're somehow out of place.

I went to Solid Rock's (1) event. (Those of you have never been to Solid Rock should check it out, listen one of their podcast.) (1) is a gathering of all of their branches. Everyone's invited. They bring a 'big band', last year it was Phill Wickham, this year they brought Leeland. But before all that, they started with food, then communion, followed by preaching geared to encouraging people to be baptized. Followed by baptisms. They had three pools, and tons of people where baptized. It was all pretty quick. My baptism had way more... deliberation, classes, testing...

One of the things we step into as Christians is the family of God. We join Abraham. We're in a sense adopted. I think back to my baptism...

There are times when the Christian walk isn't easy. And there are times when you can choose to flat out walk away. Perhaps it was just youth. Perhaps we can excuse ourselves.

Sure, God brought me back to faith in Him. Sure, He's forgiven me, 'He's washed me white as snow.' Perhaps it is a path God wanted me to take, all a part of His grander plan. Yet it all happened. There is a record, even though God has settled my debt. Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.Ps 25:16 Others around me see... the changes. They see the growth. Or perhaps they don't even know my past, my sins.

But I do.

I have often wondered at what it is we have to have faith in. Believe in God! Have faith! I used to wonder at that. Just like I have wondered about Psalm 26. Perhaps this is one of those things we as Christians struggle believing in, having faith in, putting all our hopes in. The fact that we truly are forgiven.

Yes, I was, am, at fault. I willfully sinned. Yet, because of God's love, because of the Cross, I am forgiven. Because of the resurrection, I am invited to the family of Jesus. Because of my confession of faith, public baptism, I have been given life.

Somehow I am... blameless- despite being the one to blame - and I am now never truly alone.
----------------------


As a reminder: I am still accepting submissions to Your Blessings so go Check it out! I'm giving away 50$ bucks to the winner!

Tragedy, Narcissism, and the Tower of Babel.

Listening to a bit of Amy Winehouse today. Strange, sad. She was good, great. Hmm... Weird. Her music has so much soul, so much pain. The drugs, the alcohol. In an age of Baby Britney and Lady Gaga, Amy was in a strange way refreshing. And tragic.

Normally, I really don't care about celebrities. I hardly listen to music, and then it's Pandora, and more or less the white noise variety when I read or write. Somehow, this girl is different. Like Kirk Cobain. Meteoric rise, tragic fall.

Have you ever wondered how that would feel?

I think that part of being human is that innate nihilism. I'm obviously not free of this sin (look up at the URL of the page... My name... Haha.) The natural, God-given, drive for self preservation, for reproduction, turned in on itself, corrupted. The desire for eternity, earned by oneself. Hubris, one of the first corporate sins of our kind. "Come, let us build ourselves a city and a tower with it's top in the heavens, and let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be dispersed over the face of the whole earth." God forbid we be obscure.

I've often wondered at that story, the tower of Babel.

Our drive for success. For relevance. For a place in the eternal memories. The builders of Babel are remembered; I guess. Amy might be as well. What about you?


- mDimitry

Blessings

Last night, my sister sent me a text message.

"My tire was slashed!" 

My heart sank. A few days ago, my neighbors' tire was slashed. It's unfortunate, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't just a random act either. These people are abrasive, loud at all ours of the night, constantly fighting with everyone on the street we live on. They have an adopted kid that seems to make trouble, and well... Yeah. I can see how someone could be upset with them. 

When their tire was slashed, I heard them blaming everyone in the neighborhood. Everyone, including the Russian Mobsters across the street- us. So having my sister's tires slashed would have been more than just a random act of violence. It could have been in 'retaliation' for us. 

The worst part was, if they had done it; and later someone slashed their tires again... They would think the situation is escalating. My family wants nothing more to do with this than... To be left alone in peace and quiet. 

It turned out, my sister was playing a joke on me. She just got a flat. She was at the store. By the time I responded, Erik had already changed it. Everything was fine. I'm not sure I have ever been so happy about a regular flat tire. I literally felt blessed. 

Jesus tells us to, when struck, turn the other cheek. :-) 

I got to thinking about what sort of response we should have had if it really was a slashed tire. Call the cops? Ok... What then? How does someone take this situation and actually... Deal with it? 

Suffice to say... I'll be praying for my neighbors, and peace I the neighborhood. 

But- Speaking of Blessings- check out my new little contest. I'm giving away $50 bucks. 

Your Blessings

We've already had one great submission by my friend Megan. I also posted. It's exactly what I'm looking for. Check it out. :-) now I'm off to school. Ciao!

Remember.

Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. (Psalm 42:11 NIV)

On Sunday, I went at church. One of the sermons I hear was on the work God has for us, and that we are to use what is in our hands. The next sermon I listened to was about suffering. Pain.

Later that night I went to Starbucks with the youth group from my church. It was strange, watching everyone having a good time. The whole time, I was trying to remember what it was I forgot. Some... Activity on Monday. Come Monday, I was reminded. I had promised to go to a funeral with my mother.

Over the last year, I have seen God rebuild my life. I have seen His had slowly change me, teach me, guide me. I have seen Him open up His Word to me regularly. I have had scriptures given at just the right time, sermons told right when I needed them. Chance encounters with fellow Christians that were perfectly timed to match the needs of my soul. My needs, my things, my problems.

I remember when my dad died, standing there at the funeral home, looking down with my mother. Yesterday, I stood with my mother, looking down at another father. Another Great man, thought I didn't know him. I stood outside, watching the family mourn, a few yards away from my own father's grave.

I remember my father's brothers saying words about my dad, and watching this mans brothers saying the same things about this man. I remember pastor talking about how Enoch walked with God, and was no more, and their pastor said the same things.

We share our lives, and we all share our pains. Our hopes, our struggles as we push forward with our humanity. I remember listening to a sermon on John 11:35 where 'Jesus wept' over Lazarus with Mary and Martha. The Creator weeps with us, he sees our pain. He experienced that pain, lived it. It is for us to stand together, with Him. It is for us to work at comforting those around us. To mourn, and to remember.

I was talking with someone yesterday. They asked me to show them my father's grave. As we walked over, he told him about his wife who he had buried a few years before. I remember how much this man had helped me family since my father's passing and it all made sense.

I understood his tears a bit more.

His closeness.

Skylarovs- I am sorry for your loss. May God comfort your family.

Memories from a Youth

Petals will fall softly.
Yet when the jasmine blooms,
The night will be full of life-
And Perfumes.

When I was younger living in the country around Spokane I used to take walks in the middle of the night. I remember a bright night, the moon was out, walking along. It was warm. This was years ago. There was this girl, beautiful. I was still a boy, and I remember how a simple smile from her me was...

Well, I'm sure you remember.

I remember walking along that night, dreaming, and all of this sudden a perfume. It was her scent. I remember standing there, taking in the night. So rich, so vibrant. Have you ever had a moment in your life so perfect?

The world pulses with life, the clarity of thought. The warm summer breeze caressing the blossoms. The sweet aroma of a goddess. The tall grass whispering soft poetry, as an owl calmly hoots approval in the distance. Aside from the gentle murmuring of nature there is a silence. Innocence. Purity. Youth.

We grow up. We move away. Life teaches us some hard lessons.
Yet, here I am, next to the jasmine, and it is again in full bloom.

Joy in the Rain

I watch as the sun pokes it's way through the clouds. A rainy day in July? I thought it was summer!?

Yet, come to think of it, isn't it that way here in Vancouver/Portland? It rains at random and often. The plants stay green, and life rarely dies out. It's like our lives, sometimes the poor weather brings that much needed water- because sometimes we forget to bring it ourselves.

I've had a couple of very... personal conversations in the last few days. Bring up old journals and blogs for this thing. My heart has been going through some cloudy weather. Yet... Like the rain today... It's somehow refreshing. And now I look at the sun reaching through. It will rain, it will stop.

Live life day by day.

For with thee is the fountain of life;
in thy light we shall see light

Psalm 36:9

Hello Old Friends

Who are we? Who am I?

I look around myself and see a bit of history in most things. Landscaping? Who thought of that? Architecture. The chair I am sitting on, the type of coffee I drink. Funny thing- today, I paid for my coffee using my phone- even thought it would have been easier to pull out my card. My card? Why not the cash I carry? Cash? What is cash, but paper? Expensive paper with pictures of Presidents. Who thought of presidents?

I took a little walk with my friend Matt Slade today, and we got to talking about life. He and I like to wax philosophic all the time, so it's not an uncommon topic. One of the thing's I've really has some fun looking at this summer has been a historical perspective for some of the things I believe. Things I think I know. The more I do know, the more I understand that I am but a child. At 25.

-We have these great moments of insight, these great victories, grand adventures, then something else comes along and distracts us. Or worse yet, discourages. As some of you have noticed, it appears I've gone blog crazy lately. Others that may know me better, know I've been writing for years. Blogging for at least 6. It started with Xanga, moved to Myspace, and floated around in Facebook. And now I'm on here, Blogger, and... well... I've been dragging old blogs from years past onto this one.

Take a look, stuff from literally 5-6 years ago. Some of it eerily correct, others silly, and some downright wrong. Other things I've forgotten. Forgotten friends... I have friends I haven't talked to in a while because life has drawn us apart.

Marriages, families, jobs. Other people I now realize I should just stay away from (Jimmy, Thomas, Jamie, Akhbar, Kasbar... J/k) I've picked up lifestyles, and put them down. Had jobs. Moved. Fell in love. Experienced loss. Joys. Pains. It's weird having the ability to have that historic perspective about oneself. It's good to see the positive influences over the years, the good things. I look forward, still. :-)

The Ill lit Path.

Close your eyes for a moment. Think.

Think about what you would imagine I want you to think about. I'm thinking about you. I assume your sitting, laptop, cellphone. You just saw this post. I have a bit of hour attention. Now think about me, I'm home from work, early. I have on my comfy pants, a cup of tea, listening to music. Are your cloths more comfortable than mine?

I think it's strange how a mind can flit from place to place. Thought to thought.

As I watch my mother struggle with the death of my father; I can't help but look again at my life. It's as if I'm bound up in a seemingly endless struggle. A crazy journey.

I'm reading the book of Psalms at the moment. Imagine this, I'm sitting here. Your where you are, and the Psalmist is in a cave. In the next one, he's on a throne. In another he's I'm front of the Temple, where it is being rebuilt. One, he's in exile- Babylon. Time flows. Places shift. Lives are lived. Deaths are forgotten.

Sometimes I think of my life as a path I walk along. It's dark, the road is narrow. Sometimes I feel lost, blind. I want to hurry. The world around me is too hard, life seems too finite, death too real.

My tears mean nothing, my joy is short lived. I run ahead, I fall behind. My mind races, I cannot sleep. I am tired. I'm lost, God, I'm lost.

"I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments."

http://bible.us/Ps119.176.KJV

Then I remember, I am on a path, but I'm not alone. I do have a Shepard. My life is meaningful, and the journey will come to am end. I really am here, you really are there, and our lives will make sense one day.

I hope.

;-)